Before having a baby, I didn’t think twice before telling my sister she should put her son in daycare. I told her it would be good for him, and it would give her the chance to work (since she’s a single mom). Now that I have a baby of my own, things aren’t as black and white as they used to be.
Once I gave birth, everyone was asking me when I was going back to work. At first I kept saying probably after a year of maternity leave. But the more the year passed, the more I wasn’t ready to put my baby in daycare. I started thinking that before one year-old it was way too young to put a baby in daycare. A baby needs his mother in his first year of life, I kept telling myself. Now that my baby is a year old, I still feel it’s not the right time. I feel like between one and two years there are too many firsts that you can miss if you put your baby in daycare. Plus, now that he’s used to seeing me 24/7, I’m scared he’ll think I’m abandoning him if I leave him in daycare. Besides, there aren’t any spots available in any daycare; I keep telling myself. I bet if I searched more I would find a spot. But I don’t want to. I’m just not ready to let my baby spend the day with a total stranger.
On this subject, I feel like nobody understands me. My mother didn’t have to make this choice. She was able to be a stay at home mom. My mother-in-law needed to go back to work after 6 months I think, because those were the lengths of the maternity leaves back then and they needed her income; and they lived in a small village so she perfectly knew who was babysitting her kids. My sister spent some time as a stay at home mom, but when her government income wasn’t enough she needed to start working and put her son in daycare. His first daycare was held by our aunt, so it was no stress at all; and when my aunt had to close her daycare, she found a daycare so perfect. If there was one where I live I would immediately enroll my son. I don’t feel like anyone I know had the struggle I’m having, and that’s why it stresses me so much. I feel like they can’t understand the war in my mind about putting my baby in daycare.
Before having a baby, this question wasn’t even something I thought about. I just figured I’d either be a stay at home mom like my mother was; like I wanted to be. Or end up putting my son in daycare around the age of three so he could start socializing. Now that I have a baby, it’s so much more a struggle to take that first step and enroll my son in a daycare.
Until Next Time!
Young Mom ❤